28 Weeks. Hello, Third Trimester!

I'd like to officially welcome myself to the third trimester! I am so excited to be entering this final stretch of my pregnancy. The past months have just flown by, and I know the remaining months will do the same. In between now and June, just about every single weekend is booked with something. I'll also be wrapping up my final photo sessions before my extended break, so it will be a busy April!

I had a neat experience a few nights ago. I was laying in bed, watching my tummy shift with all of Ethan's turns and flips, when what appeared to be a tiny foot pushed straight up above my belly button. He actually held it there long enough for me to feel that little bump with my fingers and it even felt like a foot from the outside! He's really taking advantage of what little space he has and seems to always be stretching body parts and running in place. ;) Ethan also had his first case of the hiccups (at least that I am aware of) a couple of nights ago. He also has them now, as I type!

After pulling out all of Gracie's baby stuff recently, sorting through what would be kept and what could be given away, I realized that we were going to need a few key baby items, ones that weren't pink or floral print. Every single blanket was all girl, as were the burp cloths and towels and bibs. I finally decided to just go to Babies R Us and register, although I hadn't planned on adding much to a registry beyond diapers and wipes. It was totally overwhleming at first, I guess I had completely forgotten how much a newborn and breastfeeding mother need, but I had fun scanning the necessities, as well as a few things I think Ethan would enjoy. I think he deserves to have a few non-hand-me-down toys and books. :) We are feeling lucky to already have so many of the bigger/more costly baby items. I was thinking ahead when I registered for Gracie, and so much of what she had was only used briefly and looks fairly new.

I'm still enjoying making prenantal yoga a priority. It's amazing the difference even just a 15 minute meditation and stretch session makes in how I'm feeling. As for cravings, I still really haven't had many strong cravings, but I've noticed a strange addiction to carrots since Thanksgiving (when I almost handled the entire carrot section of a vegetable tray on my own...). I can easily go through a bag of baby carrots per week. A more recent craving has been cranberries, these are also always on the grocery list, and a favorite for Gracie as well.

We have about 12 weeks to go!

Sweet Sunday.

Today a sweet little boy, and a friend of Gracie's, turns three. His momma and I first bonded over Starbucks drinks and dreams of motherhood. Her little boy was born on the 27th of March, Gracie on the 27th of May. Since they are exactly two months apart, I know that once his birthday arrives, it's time to let reality settle in. My daughter will be three in just two short months! It's at this point that I'll start making celebration decisions and preparing myself for her THIRD birthday. These first years with our firstborn have just gone by so quickly.

I woke up this morning to a little face and a sweet voice telling me to look, the sun was up. In a pregnant-momma-who-did-not-sleep-well haze, I pulled my baby girl into my arms to snuggle before forcing myself to roll out of bed. We arrived at church a few minutes early, so we strolled the halls of what will soon be Gracie's preschool, stopping to admire the artwork and crafts displayed along the hallway walls and doors. She'll officially start at the end of August and I'm so excited about this for her. I think Gracie will just love coming to "school" and learning along with little friends.

She's been doing well in her Sunday school class. When we dropped her off this morning, I had to try multiple times to get her attention so that I could tell her bye... She jumped right into an activity and seemed completely comfortable with me leaving. As her mommy, I always worry. Will she have a good time? Will she find a friend to play with? Will she tell the teacher when she needs to potty? I think I can relax a little, she seems to be thriving in her toddler independence. A teacher approached us this morning to tell us that she is so sweet and "quiet". I wouldn't really use the word quiet to describe my child, but I imagine that she is much more reserved when we aren't around and she's one of many children in a class. Even as a baby, she was more likely to sit back and observe before making any moves.

Sean and I enjoyed an uplifting service this morning. I'm so pleased with all that our church is doing within the community, especially with the young people. I hope that Gracie and Ethan will one day be a part of all the amazing things our youth group is doing to reach out and serve. It's inspiring to me to watch these kids stand up and speak about their commitment to making a difference.

I hope everyone has had a blessed Sunday! After this morning, and a yoga session this afternoon, I feel ready to take on the coming week!

(I tried to upload a picture of Gracie, but it wasn't working right...maybe later.)

What. A. Week.

I can't remember the last time I was this desperate for a weekend, but here I am, all but on my hands and knees thanking the Lord that it's Friday afternoon. This week has been challenging. It has worked me mentally, physically, and perhaps most of all, emotionally. I think I have told myself (and those that are lucky enough to get to listen to me vent) that I am "losing my mind" at least once per day, since Tuesday. I have decided this just has to be my last baby, because I'm not sure how I would even begin to handle being pregnant with two young children to care for...(although I'm still holding onto all my baby girl stuff, just in case...).

But, now that there is a real end in sight, I'm feeling a weight already lifting. Weekends are these very necessay things, and not just to those who work outside of the home, but to those who work within the home, too. While I'll still be "momma" all weekend, I'll have an extra set of hands to bring giggles, wipe tears, kiss boo-boos, discipline...you get the idea (and this is where my respect for single mothers shoots through the roof. My own mother has been there and I admire women without that extra set of hands more than I could express...).

I also thrive on time spent with my family. I come out of a weekend feeling refreshed, rejuvenated, and ready to take on the week ahead. The frustrations of this past week won't matter tomorrow, they don't really matter much now, not when spending quality time with my husband and daughter is on the agenda. I've got this little guy flipping around in my belly as I type, a beautiful daughter stirring from her afternoon nap, and a wonderful and supportive husband that will be on his way home soon... I am thankful for these blessings and thankful for moments of clarity that bring things back into perspective.

Happy Weekend. :)

Wordless Wednesday.

We're celebrating the warm weather by getting out and enjoying it.

Happy Wednesday!

Time Out.

Gracie insisted that she go to the bathroom by herself today, but not on her potty, on the big one. I tried to explain why it was a good idea for me to stand by and help her, but she started to cry and made it clear she wanted me out of the bathroom. Part of me wanted to give her the chance, part of me knew why this was not going to go well.

In the end, there was pee all over her pants and running down the toilet. One more mess, one more change of clothes that I didn't want to deal with. As frustrated as I was, I tried to calmly explain once again why she still needs mommy's help, but all I did was make her cry. I felt like I was telling her she couldn't do something, when she believed that she could. It hurt my feelings that hers were hurt. It upset me that I upset her by speaking more harshly than I should have. It was one of those moments where I would have liked a "do-over", a chance to approach my toddler in a different way, turn the moment into a learning experience with smiles, instead of one with tears.

This post is my own "time-out", a chance to clear my thoughts and breathe. Since becoming a mother, I've learned that some days are harder than others, sometimes both of our emotions run high and we both cry, and sometimes I feel guilty for not being better, or more patient, or more gentle towards her when she's done something as simple as try to potty on her own...

I realize that I'm not alone and that parenting in general is challenging. I also know that even on the toughest days we're trying hard to be the mothers our babies deserve. It's not always easy, but that little girl is my heart and I'll always be striving to be better tomorrow than I was today.

My time out is over. Now I just want to let my baby know how proud I am of her, and tell her how much I love her.

27 Weeks.

Tomorrow I'll officially be 27 weeks pregnant. I'm still not sure how we got this far this quickly, but here we stand, just a week away from slipping out of the 2nd trimester and into the 3rd. My little guy is almost 2 pounds (about the size of a head of cauliflower) and a little over 14 inches long.

Last week, I went in for my glucose-screening test. I drank a fruit punch flavored drink, with 50mg of sugar, then waited an hour to have blood taken to test for gestational diabetes. I'm happy to report that I passed and also received good news concerning the other results of the blood work.

During the hour wait, I had my monthly visit with the doctor. Everything once again checked out great. I was able to hear Ethan's heartbeat, which is something I always look forward to. My only concern during this visit was my recent weight gain. I gained 9 pounds in a month. So, I had a little chat with the doctor regarding this topic. He first assured me that if I were going to have a jump in weight, this is when it would be, so while I'm not excited about it, it's happening at the right time. He explained ways that I can maintain my current weight for the next 2-4 weeks, which would then put me back on track for their recommendations and my own personal goal.

It seems like I should have made some of these changes from the beginning, but I'm making more of an effort now to cut the empty calories, while also adding in more exercise (especially now that it's warming up). I'm switching back to skim milk, because I have been drinking a LOT of 2% milk, which is just building up unnecessary calories and fat. I've really been enjoying making prenatal yoga a priority each day. I end up feeling so much better and more energized, even when I have to force myself to do it. Sean bought me a new yoga mat and prenatal yoga DVD for Christmas, so it's finally getting the use it deserves.

I recently pulled out my "Gracie" pregnancy journal and found it very interesting that at this same point with her I gained 10 pounds in a month! I am also almost the exact same weight. The only difference is that I weighed more in the beginning with her. I guess my body decided it should keep things fair and catch up. :) Worst case scenario is I have a few extra pounds to lose. I am SO thankful that this is the only thing that has been a concern (if you can even call it that) during this pregnancy!

Ethan still moves all the time. It is so funny to me because while I've been pregnant before, I have never experienced this type of movement! Sean and I both wonder what in the world he is doing in there... it feels like maybe I'm pregnant with a little rabbit instead of a baby?! Sean and I just enjoy watching and feeling him do his thing and we're anxious to see what he's like once he's here with us, on the outside! We only have 92 days (give or take a few) to go!

A Pink Tree for Gracie.

I've expressed Gracie's love for flowers many times since last spring. She seems to appreciate the process, the nothingness that slowly becomes something beautiful. We've been checking on our flowers daily and there is almost always something new to observe as the first day of spring approaches. She's also been noticing the blooming trees that stand in the yards and line the streets of our neighborhood, as well as those we pass while out. My little lover of pink has been requesting to see "pink trees" for a couple of weeks now, and luckily, they are getting easier and easier to find. Last weekend, we discovered we have our own "pink tree" blooming in the backyard. This tree didn't bloom at all last year, so we were surprised and delighted to learn Gracie wouldn't have very far to go to find a tree with blooms in her favorite color!

I took this picture this morning before we left for Kindermusik. I am so excited about spring outfits and flip flops! The high was 80 degrees today!

Here is Gracie on St. Patrick's Day. I cut out a shamrock for her, wrote her name in glue, and let her go to town with the glitter...I am still finding glitter in her hairline and she pointed out that I had glitter on my face today! That gold glitter sure was fun though!

Happy Friday!

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday.

Even when she's not feeling well, you can still catch a smile on Gracie's face. :)

This was taken on Monday evening. Sean was grilling hamburgers and she wanted to be outside with him. I finally decided the fresh air probably wouldn't hurt, after almost two days of being stuck in the house! I bundled her up and let her sit outside for a few minutes with her daddy.

Gracie seemed to be feeling better yesterday. She woke up without a fever, so we did get out for lunch with my mom, then ice cream with Ashley and Austin. Unfortunately, the fever crept back up last night! She has seemed more "normal" so far today...no fever to speak of yet, but we're taking it easy just in case. I don't know what she picked up, but it has been a tough virus for her to get rid of! If the fever creeps up again this evening, we'll be back at the doctor tomorrow. I'm praying that isn't the case, but I am surprised she's been feeling poorly for this many days (since early afternoon on Sunday, and of course we took her to church not knowing she may pass this on to the kids in her class! Ugh.).

My girl is sick.

Gracie is sick, and it's been frustrating for me because she's had no other symptoms on top of a fever (averaging around 102.5). Last night was a long one. I couldn't sleep knowing she had this fever that was likely to creep up as she slept, with no known explanation. I checked in on her multiple times, even waking her up to take more Motrin at 3am. I ended up just laying with her in her bed until 5am, and while she seemed to sleep peacefully, I could just feel the heat from her little body through her pajamas, even after a full dose of medicine.

She came into our bedroom this morning with a pleasant "it's rise and shine!" greeting (she says this to make sure I know it is morning and she can be up and out of her bed, but doesn't say "it's time to rise and shine", just "it's rise and shine!"), but she was still so hot and looked absolutely pitiful. I immediately got us both ready and took her to the doctor. After running through a list of questions, the doctor described her as a "diagnostic dilemna" and started making his way through a check-list of possibilities:

Her ears looked great. No ear infection.

Her throat looked a little red, so he did a quick Strep test. Negative.

Maybe a UTI? I was able to get Gracie to provide a urine sample. No UTI.

The next step was checking her white blood cell count. After a pricked finger and a sparkly band-aid, the doctor came back to tell us her white blood cell count was normal.
Gracie insisted that her blood is not white, it's red...duh, Dr. W. ;)

In the end, I was advised to keep giving her Motrin and more fluids. He suspects she has some sort of viral infection that needs to run it's course, but if she's not better by Wednesday, he's asked me to let him know.

He gave her three coins for three prizes, since she handled everything so well and was such a cooperative patient. When I took her to the prize machine, she asked for an orange ball...I tried to explain that it's kind of the luck of the turn when it comes to these machines, but that I would do my best. Nevertheless, out came an orange ball! For her next prize she requested a pink ball. I gave a hopeful glance to a father and son who'd been watching. Again, I told her I would do my best...and out came a pink ball! She chose a squishy pencil cover thingy as her third prize, but left satisfied with her choices. I told the father and son that "someone" (pointing upward) knew what my girl needed, and it was not to be dissapointed with bouncy balls in the wrong color. :)

She's trying to rest now. It's not easy, even with medicine that should make her drowsy, because she just feels that bad. When I checked on her a few minutes ago, I found her laying at the end of her bed, awake. I'm praying that we can break this fever and that she'll feel much better soon...

The Little Ones' Rooms.

Ethan's bed is ready and waiting for him. :) His room is coming along nicely and since it was once our storage room, I never realized that it's also the room that gets the best light during the day. I sat in the glider this week during Gracie's nap to read. It was so nice and relaxing, just what I needed.

I love his sailboat bedding! It was actually the only boy bedding I found that I just loved. I'm looking forward to finding frames for the matching wall art. I think it will all come together perfectly for him.

Miss Priss has also been enjoying her new bed. She's become very comfortable with getting out of it when she shouldn't...but she's been doing well for the most part, so I can't complain! One evening last week, Sean and I were watching TV upstairs when the light over the stairs went off...then back on...then off again. It was honestly a little freaky, since we hadn't heard anything over the baby monitor, but Sean discovered an escapee at the bottom of the steps, trying to get our attention at 10:30pm!

There is still lots that needs to be done in Gracie's room, but the most important changes have already been made, so we'll tackle the rest as we can. I am loving her underbed storage drawers! They eliminate the need for a dresser, which is great since she needs the space to play. The closets are under construction as well. There seems to be so much to do, but I'm really comfortable with where we are at this point!

Happy Weekend!

Heavy.

The word feels heavy in my mind before I ever even type it out, and my fingers hesitate... suicide. It's difficult for me to understand how a person can make a decision so final, so irreversible. What's done is done, there aren't any more chances to get it right or give life another try. What's left is the aftermath, a ripple effect of confusion and pain.

I like to keep things light and fluffy on my blog, and respect those involved, so I chose not to discuss my feelings here, but there was a tragic incident a week ago. It was last Friday that I found out someone I knew, someone so young, had died. Unfortunately, my sister stands in the aftermath and this is on my mind daily as I struggle for the right words to say. It was a friend of hers that chose to end his life. It was one of her best friends, his fiance, who stood as witness to this heavy, heartbreaking decision. There is a family hurting, friends in shock, family and friends of those loved ones trying to give support during an unimaginable time... here is the ripple effect. What hurts my sister hurts me and I'm having a difficult time knowing how to help her deal with this loss, while she also stands firm, as a rock, for her girlfriend.

I simply ask for thoughts and prayers for those hurting right now. It's going to be an insanely long road from here. I ask for prayers for my sister. I swear she is an angel... she's stepped in during some moments she could probably never describe, ones I would never ask her to. She's been a shoulder for her girlfriend to cry on, but also an anchor for her to cling to as everything around her has crumbled and lies forever changed.

I wish with all my heart that this could be reversed, that we could tell him life is worth fighting for. I wish that my sister never had to get that phone call or watch her own life change as she sets out to do what she can to help pick up the pieces. But, I am proud of her. She amazes me with her strength and I am proud of her.

It's raining...

I welcome the rain. It's chilly, there's an overcast sky, and we have no reason to do anything but open the blinds, get as comfortable as a hardwood floor will allow, and craft about it.

The light pitter-patter of the morning confirmed it, we have no plans today. We will likely stay in our pajamas, watch a little too much TV, and I'll snuggle up with my girl because there is really nothing more important anyway, not on a rainy day, not on any day.

Princess Parties, Pizza, and other random thoughts...

Princess Party...

We attended a Princess party this past weekend to celebrate a sweet baby girl's first birthday! Gracie had lots of fun, she's all about tutus, crowns, and magic wands. There was also the most beautiful display of candy set up on Princess P's Candy Bar. Guests were invited to fill a favor bag with their choice of candies, and there was quite the variety! Gracie's favorites were Sweet Tarts and Twizzlers and she came home completely sugared up. :) It was seriously a candy lover's dream come true!

In addition to the very clever "candy bar" (such a hit with both children and adults!), was this gorgeous cake! This castle cake is a tasty replica of the castle on Miss P's invitations. Her mommy did such an amazing job bringing all the details together!

All eyes were on Princess P as she was presented with her own cake, often called a "smash cake". It was precious watching how she tasted the icing of her cake with one little finger, so delicately! Gracie approached her cake in the same way at her first birthday party, until a family member stepped in to show her what damage could really be done! Baby P seemed to thouroughly enjoy having that little cake all to herself and eventually did end up with pink icing cheeks and covered hands!

Happy Birthday, Sweet Girl! We are so thankful we were able to celebrate with you!

Pizza...

There are times when cooking in the evenings can be a challenge. Gracie loves doing whatever she can to help and is always right by my side, watching my every move and asking questions. Most of the time, this works wonderfully. The mixing and measuring is turned into a hands on learning experience, and since it grabs her full attention, it also turns into a special mommy/Gracie activity that I love. There are other times, however, that it becomes more difficult...like when there is raw meat involved or multiple burners going at the same time on the stove... With my little cook-in-training in mind, I planned to bake a homemade pizza one evening last week. This was perfect for those little helping hands! Sean and I supervised while she took over and prepared one awesome pepperoni pizza.

I had to laugh when I turned around at one point to find the pepperonis on the pizza dissapearing...and a happy dog waiting patiently by Gracie's side. :)

Other thoughts...

I am 25 weeks pregnant today and my son is totally wild. He seems to never stop moving! Does he sleep? Is he going to be a little wiggle worm when he's born? I can't even imagine what he is up to in there...it feels like he's kicking off one end of my stomach, gaining the momentum needed to perform backflips and forward rolls, while simultaneously waving his arms above his head. The amount of movement that I feel throughout the day and at night is much different from what I experienced with Gracie. I remember laying very still, hands on my tummy, waiting to feel her dainty kicks. Ethan is ready to run!

Gracie has already started playing with her little brother. :) She likes to sit with me and talk to him (when she says his name I just melt) and she'll often lay her head on my belly in hopes of getting a little kick in the cheek. She also has fun putting different stuffed animals on my stomach to see if he will find them. He usually does! We are so ready to meet this little guy. He is already such a blessing to our family.

Happy Tuesday!

24 Weeks. :)

We were blessed with another beautiful afternoon yesterday. Gracie and I spent some time playing outside. This child loves her flowers! She's been checking on them daily ever since the tiniest bit of green broke through the mulch around the trees and mailbox. Now, the flowers are blooming and I love watching her crouch down next to them to inspect their progress. :) We are so ready for spring!

The weeks continue to zip by and I reached the 24 week mark on Tuesday. Ethan is weighing in at a little over a pound and is about as long as an ear of corn! There is no doubt that this boy is growing! I feel like my belly has just popped on out there over the past couple of weeks. I can't even imagine how it will look 16 weeks from now!

Things have been going well since my appointment last week. I've been staying active during the day, but have also made a point to take it easy while Gracie is resting. I carry a water bottle everywhere I go now to make sure I'm getting plenty of water throughout the day. I'm also sleeping well for the most part. I'm so tired by the time I go to bed that I don't have any trouble falling asleep.

I've been saying it for weeks, but this little guy is active! I love it! I feel him throughout the entire day, as opposed to only feeling him at certain times. My next appointment will be my glucose screening test on St. Patrick's Day!